


Ikea Ideas

by QueenBoo



Series: Tumblr Prompts! [2]
Category: The Mighty Boosh (TV)
Genre: Drabble, Fluff, M/M, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-14 17:01:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28798779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenBoo/pseuds/QueenBoo
Summary: Based on the one-sentence prompt: "I'm not buying IKEA furniture again!", Vince tries to be romantic, it's not wholly successful.
Relationships: Howard Moon/Vince Noir
Series: Tumblr Prompts! [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2111445
Comments: 10
Kudos: 13





	Ikea Ideas

**Author's Note:**

> Another prompt from Tumblr! Originally for the tumblr user @edenismissingasnake :D
> 
> [original post](https://anciientboosh.tumblr.com/post/615397028808294400/90-90-im-not-buying-ikea-furniture-again)

If nothing else, IKEA was invented so that people like Vince could pull off ridiculously romantic gestures and look like proper accomplished adults in the process. Right? 

This was the kind of thing that people in films do, he thinks. All selfless and with a deep meaning, showing off how well they knew their significant other. It almost always ended with tearful declarations and a pretty good snog. Worth it, in his opinion. 

Vince was trying to put a bookshelf in their bedroom. 

It may not sound like much, but since beginning to share a bed rather than existing on opposite ends of the room, they’ve had a bit of extra space. Space that had initially been designated as a place for a wardrobe extension. Howard had begrudgingly intended let him do just that, the perfect gentlemen that he was. 

Except when they’d started moving furniture around to put this plan into action Vince had noticed that while much more organised, Howard also owned _a lot_ of stuff. Under his bed, crammed in boxes, were stacks of books and records. Old photos and small trinkets that Vince recognised from years gone by all packed away in storage.

Howard was a quietly sentimental type, and Vince was in love enough to think that if his partner deemed it important enough to save then it deserved to be somewhere other than under a bed gathering dust. 

On paper the concept was perfect. Howard would be gone all day helping Lester move into a smaller flat (he takes up a lot less room now that he is just a head) and Naboo was unlikely to bother him thanks to the alien strength illicit substances he’d come home with two days ago. 

In practice, not so perfect. 

Vince has never put anything together in his entire life. He understands the theory of it - part A in slot B. Flatpack furniture existed to help the common man conquer the world of DIY, why not Vince? 

But not even the simply worded instructions - that come with _pictures_ \- could save him. 

There’s a lot of pieces for a bookshelf. It’s like a magic trick unpacking them all, they just _keep coming_. Spreading them about himself on the bedroom floor leaves him in the centre of a crude-looking summoning circle and he can’t fathom how he’s supposed to make this into a piece of furniture. 

That’s how Howard finds him. 

Somehow he has successfully managed to convince two pieces to partner up and stay there. But it doesn’t _feel_ right. They’re propped in front of him, which is a success on the freestanding front, yet looking strange. Vince is certain they’re laughing at him. 

It’s enough for him to feel justified batting it over with the back of his hand and taking great satisfaction in how it _thumps_ to the floor. 

He produces a spectacular pout and demands of the shape, “Why aren’t you helping?”

“Probably because it’s wood.” Startled from his tantrum, he whips around to find Howard hovering in the doorway. His tiny eyes narrowed in confusion. 

“Howard!” In his panic, he sweeps what he can of the evidence behind him. All this serves to do, of course, is mix up the bits he’s spent ages sorting and simultaneously draws Howard’s attention directly to it. “You’re home.” 

“Vince,” Howard slowly begins to smirk. “I am. What are you doing?”

“Uh..” Despite the fact it’s going to be impossible to pull off in any convincing way, Vince lies. “It’s a thing- for Naboo. Well weird.” 

“Oh I see,” Howard is unconvinced, that much is clear. The amusement on his features doesn’t change as he crouches beside Vince and reaches for the forgotten instruction manual. “So you’re not trying to put furniture together, then?” 

“Nope.” Vince feels his traitorous cheeks heating.

Howard is giddy like a schoolboy let in on a private joke, a wolfish grin splits his features. “And you definitely don’t want any help?” 

At this point, he thinks he’ll keep lying just to entertain his partner. It’s rare he gets to play the role of the cheeky one. He wants to savour the look of it; the way his whole body seems to radiate mischief from the flash of his eyes to the tension in his muscles from concealing his laughter. 

It’s so breathtaking he can’t bring himself to form words anymore. He can only shake his head dumbly. 

“Alright then,” Instructions in hand, Howard pushes himself to his feet. The confidence in his frame as he moves for the open doorway makes Vince dizzy. “I’ll take this then, shall I? If you’re not building anything. I quite like instruction manuals, I’ll read this with a cup of tea. Really helps to broaden the mind-” 

“Alright, you smug prat, you’ve made your point.” He could have let that little speech go on. Wanted to, quite a bit, if just to indulge in that egotistical part of Howard that never fails to make him feel tingly. But he would quite like to finish what he’s started. “It was supposed to be a surprise.” 

Howard, regrettably, drops the act. Reinserts himself on the floor by Vince’s side. “What was?” 

Rather than say it explicitly, Vince waves his arm about to indicate the mess of screws and wooden shapes. “You’ve got some important stuff just hangin’ about under your bed,” As he explains, Howard’s jaw slackens in surprise, he flips to the front of the manual to see the diagram of the finished product displayed proudly and appears to put two and two together. “Seems a shame, is all. Thought we should have somewhere proper to put it.” 

“Vince…” Howard puffs out a breath of disbelieving laughter. “That’s- That’s incredibly sweet.” 

Vince looks down at his own hands twisting nervously in his lap. “Yeah, well. Didn’t really work did it?” 

“On the contrary, sir,” Howard says, the air of superiority returns as he lays out comfort like it’s fact. “Technically, the surprise part was a success. I definitely did not expect to find you doing this when I got home.”

“What were you expecting then?” Howard’s only response is to waggle his eyebrows in a fashion he certainly was not capable of a few short months ago, all playful seduction. It forces a startled cackle from his throat. “You are _such_ a pervert.” 

“The point is,” Vince finds a comforting hand placed on his knee. “You did well, Howard Moon is not an easily surprised man.” 

“It’s true,” Vince agrees teasingly. “You’re way too paranoid.” 

“And the thought was… Perfect.” Howard’s gaze softens. The palm on his knee finds its way carefully over his shoulders. Vince sinks into the half embrace he is pulled into. “ _You’re_ perfect.” 

There’s a kiss dropped to his forehead and whether he managed to do it on his own or not, it was all worth it. “Shall we finish putting this together, then?” He asks gently, unwilling to disturb the moment. 

“Sure thing, little man.” 

“One this is for certain,” He sighs, watching Howard begin to gleefully sort through the pieces. **“I’m not buying IKEA furniture again.”**

**Author's Note:**

> Have a prompt, a question, or just want to say hi? Come find me on tumblr:
> 
> @queen-boo / @anciientboosh


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